Small, small world.. and why did I have to look so bad?

OMG you guys! so I am walking through my little town, picking up dry cleaning and kids from school and who is walking in the crosswalk in front of me?? ANDRE LEON TALLEY! Ha.. why did I have to look like such a mom today? And yes, he did look me up and down.

The Wisdom of 12 Year Olds

Good Enough Mother featured in Infinite Field Magazine!

Discover Simple, Private Sharing at Drop.io

Mother's Day 2010

So Mother's Day 2010 will be one I will never, EVER forget. It started Saturday night with a roiling fight between my husband and son. Screaming and carrying on. I was not having it. I left. Yes that is correct, I tried to run away from home. I hit the gas, tearing for the end of the driveway and then, while in my car, began thinking " crap, they're watching me from the window and I have no where to go!" I wound up at a neighborhood bar and off to McDonald's for late night carbs and fat, just the thing my diet is lacking. NOT.

When I got home, my daughter Casey, oldest, wisest and most sensitive of the children, had this waiting for me. She did it all on her own and it brings me to tears every single time I watch it. I am so lucky to have her and he husband and son (who brought me to tears for another reason) in my life. Happy Mother's day!

MyNiceProfile.com

Mother's Day request, from Good Enough Mother

Here we are, on the cusp of another Mother’s Day where you will honor the woman who gained 35-50 pounds for you, suffered through a horrifying case of edema, labored 3-24 hours before ultimately have a C-section (okay, maybe that was just me) only to be rewarded with a bladder so weak she can never sneeze or laugh in public again. She thanks you for all that.

So on this one day, ONE DAY of the year where it is all about her, Good Enough Mother would like to lay down a few ground rules. For clarity, ease and convenience I will do them by family member.

Dear Husband/Significant Other: Thanks for the offer but no I would NOT like you and the kids to take me out to eat. Why you ask? Because you will get to eat first while I am stuck selling my soul and/or doing lap dances for other diners because in the entire restaurant, the hostess sat us at the only table with an empty ketchup bottle. The soda fountain machine has run out of carbonation and there are only two crayons for our children to use on their kiddie menus, yellow and brown (what fun is that?).

What I WOULD like is for you to TAKE the kids out to eat sans the woman who birthed them. Before you go, please swing by House of Pizza for a large, pepperoni pie and a liter of diet Coke. Could you also make sure the phone is nearby so I don’t have to remove the cucumbers from my eyes to answer it? P.S., I will not pick up if you call, asking me to tell the kids to eat their food. It’s all on you, man.

Oldest child: You are the one who started it all and I say that in only the nicest way. Mommy’s foot grew an entire half size for you and no it did not go back to the way it was before. Neither did her boobs or her bladder. Nonetheless, she loves you way more than you could ever imagine. She has this request of you.

On this day, could you please stay in the shower more than the usual 72 seconds and actually USE the soap? Drag the deodorant across your pits too. Love you.

Second child: Once the pain of birthing your brother/sister wore off, mommy did a very smart thing by having you. Her boobs and bladder were already shot to hell so you didn’t do too much damaged there. In fact, you HELPED mommy to realize that the less weight she gained meant the less she would have to take off. See there, you little smarty.

I ask this of you. No fighting over the front seat. Daddy is as old and feeble as mommy and he barely remembers your names, much less who sat in the front seat last. Just do him a favor and give that tired, old argument a rest.

Dog: My steady companion and the only one in this entire house who is genuinely happy to see me in the morning. I appreciate that. What I don’t dig is when you roll in poop. And it gets under your collar. And embedded in your fur. Could we cool it on that for mommy’s special day?

Cat(s): I know you won’t listen to me at all so this is something of an exercise in futility. But just this once, in your post meal exercise/craziness, you know before you pass out for 17 hours, how about just this once, not chasing each other around and hanging on every screen in the living room? I know I am pushing my luck, but if you could poop INSIDE the litter box instead of ON the side, that too, would be greatly appreciated. I know, picky, picky.

So there you have it. It doesn’t take expensive jewelry or flowers to make mom happy. Just a couple of simple requests and even if you cannot abide by them all, the fact that you will try makes me happy.

NOW GET LOST.. kidding.. sort of

Xoxo Mom

GEM takes on a personal trainer's take on pregnancy

I like to think of myself as a fairly easy-going person. That does not mean that certain things don’t get in my craw. Just ask the kids who have experienced, first hand, my ire after leaving lights on and TV blaring as they walk out the door.

But I came across something yesterday that really sort of got my goat.
So you know that show, The Biggest Loser with the two trainers as they coach people through extreme weigh loss. Well one of the trainers is Jillian Michaels. A warm fuzzy she is not. But I thought the interview she gave to Women’s Health was a bit extreme, even for her.

She was quoted as saying "I'm going to adopt. I can't handle doing that to my body," she told the magazine. "Also, when you rescue something, it's like rescuing a part of yourself."

Now the first thing that jumped out at me was the fact that she was talking about adopting a child the way most of us talk about adopting a puppy. Rescue SOMETHING? WHAT? My husband is adopted and never in the 16 years we’ve been married, have I referred to or thought of him as a “something”.

Now whether Ms. Michaels decides to have a child is totally her prerogative. But I think as a trainer who is a woman, she might want to make pregnancy sound less like a disease. There are plenty of women who get pregnant pop out the kid and then get right back in shape or better (hello, Madonna?). I also agree with Gwyneth Paltrow’s trainer, Tracy Anderson, who said in an op-ed piece in the Huffington Post, “To claim that pregnancy and natural childbirth are somehow unhealthful for a woman’s body sends an incorrect message to women everywhere…” My personal feeling is if you work hard, you can pull your body back to where it was pre-pregnancy, or at least a close approximation.

Just this morning Casey brought a little card over for me to look at. It was one of the many hand made mother’s day gifts kid’s make with their blocky pre-school hand writing. Special at the time, more special 7 years later.







Of course, it’s Ms. Michaels' prerogative to not want to do that to her body but here’s a little secret. What carrying a kid doesn’t do, age and gravity will take care of. Not only will she not have those perky boobs at 60 (unless she’s made a quick visit to the plastic surgeon), she won’t even have a blocky lettered Mother’s day card, written with love by stubby little hands, to look back on. That is of course, unless she decides to “rescue something.

So the Good Enough Mother question of the day is, how do you feel about Jillian Michaels proclamation?